Hey! So we did it… we finally did it. We moved house! This is something that we have been wanting for years and after Dave had a dream that we should be moving, with the process starting the morning after the dream, we finally moved at the beginning of March. A very anxious 13 weeks after we had our offer accepted.
That spring clean moment for us started in November as soon as we sold the house and I have been so excited about making a new start. For me, the move was all about A FRESH START with everything. Who I work for, who I surround myself with, how I handle my anxiety, how I raise my children, how I cope with daily life as a mum who juggles work/house/kids/life. For me, this move was bigger than the house, it was all about saying GOODBYE to my depression and focusing on getting myself to where I have dreamt of for so long.
My prayers were answered and God listened.
As all the boxing up was happening, I felt numb. I was actually at the point where I wanted to leave everything but my family photo’s behind and start all over again. I have been ready for the new start for a while now.
I’m not sure if it was wise but I chose to go cold turkey on my anti-depressants on the day of the move. There’s nothing wrong with taking them but I have become dependent on them for years now. Relying on them to give me the energy and balance that my brain needs. It was annoying me how all my friends seem to juggle a hectic life without tablets and I needed them. I have been weak for so long. This is my chance to feel and be strong and to start a new journey where I learn to deal with my emotions.
My family and I love our new home and from the second we moved in, this house felt like OUR home. It was meant to be. God helped us find the home that fitted us. I will forever be grateful.
The neighbours so far, seem so lovely. We have had lovely welcome cards and the local kids come and knock for Nevie, Myla and Matilda to play out on their bikes.
I’m determined to get rid of the stress. I have come to realise that I can’t cope with stress. I just can’t cope with any form of stress. I only want to do the things that make me smile. I want life to flow without the stress. I like seeing my kids happy with their own space and Dave happy with his space. I’m fed up with crying in front of my kids.
Looking back, in 16 years, we have worked so hard to progress on the housing ladder. The two of us didn’t have expectations of a house. We just wanted to live together and be home-owners. We knew that each house we lived in was never our forever home. We tried to move several times but each time proved impossible until we decided to speak with an independent mortgage broker and she managed to offer more opportunities than a bank. We were surprised! She went beyond her call of duty. Being a mum herself meant that she understood our needs. I would encourage anyone looking to buy to speak with Pam at Chine Financial because she truly was our guardian angel and we will forever be grateful for making that phone call to her the day after Daves dream.
Unpacking means that I’m analysing everything because I don’t want to fill my home with ‘the black cloud’. Everything in my home needs to have that lovely, happy feeling. I need everything in my house to scream ‘we will be okay’ and I’m pretty sure that sounds crazy. Not only does this approach take place in my personal belongings but with activities and friends and work. Life is short and I know that it’s too important to waste. I can’t afford to be that unhappy person, I have three little girls that look up to me. I’m their influence. I’m the main woman in their beautiful lives that they are inspired to be.
Anyway, thank you for reading my rambles!